The Surrender Adventure of a Life Time-SOUTH AFRICA pt 1 "The Help"

South African time. It's the same as "Fiesta time", "Island Time". "No worries man" time. But no matter the time, Jane Simmons of Unity Worldwide Headquarters in Lee's Summit, MO, Maura Fallon of Unity of the Hills in Austin, Texas, Executive Director of the Light Center in Baldwin, Kansas Robin Goff and I (let's just say "World Traveler) had the most amazing time together just being a presence of light during our trip to Cape Town, South Africa.

Time was an element that became an ongoing topic. As our schedule was being created on the fly which danced around planned events that had a scheduled start and ending time, it was humorous to see ourselves try to navigate or organize ANYTHING.

Race and color is an issue here in similar and yet non-similar ways as you find in the United States. In fact my first 24 hours the issue of race and culture was almost a throw back in time.

On the plane ride from London to Cape Town, I watched the movie "The Help". Now as I share this part of the story I trust my "white" friends will understand I only speak in these terms from a cultural understanding perspective.

In any case, my friends who happen to be white that saw the movie "The Help" were very excited to share with me their experience seeing it. When I would tell them I had not seen it many had the response "OMG you must see this movie". Many wanted me to see the movie and tell them what I thought. With a few of them I shared  that the information depicted in the movie about segregation in the south (in reality the conditions of "The Help" were also in states far north of the Mason/Dixon line) were not new to me AND I would likely see it at some point.

Both my grandmothers were "The Help" in Wichita and Atchison, Kansas. I grew up hearing the stories they had of working for "whites". My mother has absolutely no desire to see the movie it all. But, I did watch the in flight movie and it was indeed very good, very real, and told the story with a sense of humor. One of the things depicted were the buses that dropped the black maids off in the white neighborhoods to go to work.

Jane and I stayed  at a Bed and Breakfast in a predominately white suburb called Constantia. Martene, the first person we met (she picked us up from the airport in her "backie" or pick up truck) is the owner of the  B&B. She moved to South Africa from France 25 years ago and for obvious reasons (the land, its beauty, its peacefulness) just decided to stay and has had no desire to return to her native country.

The next person we met was founder of the Novalis Ubuntu Institute  Ralph Shepard. A lovely man who I adore. His passion for social and cultural activism in healing the divide between black and white through spiritual enlightenment is a model for the world. We also met his wife Anna Lisa who (I believe) was born in South Africa making her what is called (again I believe) Afrikans (as opposed to African). She is delightful and passionate in the same regard as her husband. (CLIP)

Ralph and AnnaLisa are also members of a worldwide spiritual organization called Emissaries of Divine Light that focuses on spiritual awakening, transformation, and leadership. They live in an area of Constantia where many Emissaries of Divine Light live. The houses are nestled inside a botanical garden. Every Tuesday the members get together to sing. Not to practice for some upcoming event or to practice at all-they simply spend this time in communion with one another through the spiritual practice of singing. AMAZING.

Since we arrived on Tuesday Robin, Jane and I participated in the sing-a-long. We all shared songs we'd like to sing and because I was the resident "professional" they definitely were looking forward to what I would add. We did my song  The Universe is Calling and Send My Love (by Karen Drucker). It felt like I had gone back in time like an English colonial period. The experience of gathering around the piano to sing was like a Charles Dickens novel.. We were indeed "jolly" and I felt warmly welcomed and appreciated. At that moment it was evident (in terms of race), we had clearly moved forward in time.

The next day my first order of business was to get an asthma inhaler. Little did I realize (until the pharmacist informed me) that Cape Town has the largest number of botanical gardens in the world (thus my asthmatic episode which I have not had for almost 10 years). After inhaling the over the counter (only given by prescription in the US and cost about $18) Albuterol that cost me $4 US, I felt much better.

As I walked out of the mall I saw a bus full of black women getting off a bus, purse in tow, flat shows, walking slowly to the houses of where they would be the maids in the homes of a predominately white neighborhood. Walking back to Martene's I looked no different than these women. I could have easily been considered by people driving by as "The Help".

I have no reason to believe that the maids going to work in Constantia, experience the same racist views of many of the white women depicted in the movie. The racial make up of Black and White is the exact opposite as the United States. Whites in South Africa make up 12% of the countries population and Blacks make up 12% of US population. There are also several racial distinctions that you don't see in the US. There are Whites, Blacks and Coloureds. Coloureds are people of color that cannot be directly connected with a "tribe" such as Zulu or Xhosa (pronounced Ko-sa).

I'm thankful that I hold the belief that there is no "time" and that as I become more spiritually aware, transform, and practice a sense of "self-leadership and governance" that I am responsible for my perceptions and how I see the world. This trip to South Africa and particularly within the first 24 hours of my stay I could see the importance of having an expanded view of the world, appreciating its transformations, honoring "what is" and at the same time recognizing the up most importance of acceptance, non-judgment, and most importantly unconditional love for self and others.

The Power of Apprecation

On October 9th Chaz Wesley and I will be doing a dual speaker/musical guests role at Unity of Peace in St. Louis, Missouri. When we thought about a title for the talk, appreciation was the first to come to mind. I have been in a real place of appreciation.

Many of my "The Bukeka Show" watchers know I'll be traveling to South Africa this fall. I am more than appreciative and in awe of how it all manifested. Right now I am eager and yet I am also dropping back a bit because, all along the way to this junction of my journey, I have been surrendering big chunks of stuff for the past year.

As you know I took a surrender adventure with my friend Chaz last year. Where every two hours we lit a candle, surrendered "to and unto the universe", an ultimately drove through 7 states, and I came back changed at the core level. Recently I shared the adventure in a workshop at Unity of Oklahoma City. The first thing people agreed upon is they needed "a Chaz". (He's at www.chazwesley.com). Call him I'm sure he'd listen.

The more I appreciate the experience of surrender, the better my life experience is. Each time I recognize what can be surrendered from my thought, I grow exponentially. I become keenly aware of what I am doing, feeling, and how I am behaving. I place no judgment on any of it and I allow myself to be present to whatever is there.

The more I surrender, the more appreciative I am of my life experience. Right now, I am experiencing a sence of GREAT change in my life. I feel it stretching me from all angles. To see it from the self-observer is facinating. As I let go, release, forgive, trust, and surrender I am in love with what I see changing but more importantly I am feeling freer and freer from boundaries and seeming limitations.

Some would call it simply maturity and that would be true too, and I appreciate maturity. I appreciate having a greater understanding for as much as I can understand anything at all.

Come see us in St. Louis if you're in the area.

Love and Blessings
Bukeka
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxU860l-_-A
www.chazwesley.com
www.bukeka.com

We are designed to be in relationship

“Can’t we all just get along?” became a rallying cry after riots broke out in 1991 protesting the beating of Rodney King by police officers in Los Angeles. Yes, we can get along. In fact, the majority of the time we do! In relationship stories, conflict and confrontation get far more attention than cooperation. 

But in reality, our willingness to cooperate is what has allowed us to live and flourish among each other for hundreds of thousands of years. We live and believe the old sayings of “there is strength in numbers,” and “two heads are better than one.” 

Think of how many times during the course of a day you cooperate with another human being in kind and courteous ways. You do it all day long as you drive in traffic, deal with customers, and live with family. Most of the time, you never consider that anyone could be more or less worthy than you are.

  

When we are actively engaged in a relationship with another, we are physically and emotionally healthier.

This is NOT a test: This is it!

No not, the Michael Jackson movie. But a movie none the less in a sense. Our imagination is  as many have described, like a screen with our consciousness playing on it. As a songwriter, I have those experiences all the time of imagining something or more accurately hearing the soundtrack to an experience I have had or having in my life. 

Sometimes, we wonder "Have I hit a brick wall?" I'm happy AND it's just these last five pounds or it's all I can do think of to receive the raise. You've done the work, read the books, saw the counselor, went inside, prayed for help outside and there is still this "one" thing.

Guess what this is not a test from your emergency broadcasting system this is your life in real time if there is such a thing. Regardless, you are happening now. I am happening now.

I have several friends who have jobs and livelihoods where every day they feel a sense of purpose-they are inspired. Some people I know, are inspired because they know exactly what that looks like in their mind and are waiting to experience it. Some have dreams so big, it's hard for them to fathom doing anything else and are doing all they can to make their dreams come true. But as soon as any of this feels like pushing or fighting up against something, the inspiration turns into frustration.

The orthodox way of dealing with frustration is to DO, ACT, PUSH, RUN. Do anything but be still in the moment. But I would suggest to do just that. Allow the mind to quiet, and come from a place of peace. You may wonder, will you receive an answer, is this your"lot?" This is when it is time to abide in the stillness, be at peace with the silence. However you are to proceed, may come in such a slight whisper that it surfaces at the most unexpected moment in your conscious thought.

Since this life is not a test (to my knowledge)  instead of living a movie where this one thing still exist in your life. Be Still. Instead to spending more energy pushing against it, be still. Allow the stillness to be as still as the coldest of nights. Abide in that stillness and in that peace for a while. And rewrite the script on a blank screen having left all the remnants behind of the old movie reel.

You've seen it happen before in your life. Something always breaks through. 

I Love you, Bukeka

From the book Worthy

Everyone Has Worth

Throughout our history, humans have battled or threatened others in pursuit of food, water, shelter and power. The survival of a race, an economic way of life, or position of power can compel us to kill, demonize, and victimize others to keep what we believe we are entitled to control. Our need to fight arises from the perception that resources are limited, and a core belief that if one person is worthy of those resources, then another is not.

Who would you place on your list of history’s “worst people”?  For many Americans living today, Adolf Hitler or Osama Bin Laden may come to mind. Native Americans might recall people who took their land by force and placed them on reservations. For some retirees, or people who will never be able to retire, the worst people are corporate executives who embezzled billions of dollars, dissolving employee pensions and retirement savings.

It could be a rapist, a murderer, an abuser, or a traitor. How could any of these people be considered worthy of anything except the punishment of their crime? Based on destructive behaviors and actions, it may be hard to resolve that, no matter what, everyone, without exception, has value and worth.

But if we believe our worth is intrinsic, simply because we exist, then worth must be granted to everyone, regardless of behavior or flaws. Our existence-- not our actions--dictates our worth.

When we lack a sense of self-worth, we are unable to see it in others. Therefore, our behaviors and actions can become destructive. Something or someone without worth or value becomes disposable. If we all had self-worth and valued the worth of others, we wouldn’t engage in war and genocide.

Bathed In Surrender

After Chaz Wesley and I returned from the Surrender Adventure last year, I noticed the incredible open space that had become my life. It was new and unfamiliar. I looked around at my home, my furniture, my clothes and it was as though I had walked into a world that was mine but I had never been there. 

Each chair I sat down in was for the first time. And when I sat in significant places I had to rearrange my body to a more comfortable position. It was not the same person sitting in the chair. The first correspondence I had with my significant other, I waited quietly to hear how his voice would sound. I wondered what he would say and never thought about how I would reply. Then he said the things he's said before, but this time it sounded like all the things you'd ever want your lover to say to you..."I support you 110%." "It' your time." on and on it went, and I fell in love all over again.

When Chaz talks about being in your business and getting back to your business, in this stage of noticing your thoughts as CEO of your business you get to choose what thoughts get fired. Clearing space, gaining clarity, opening the mind. Good CEO's will notice first and act later. This is when the real noticing begins. 

I noticed my speech and demeanor were more assured. Rev. Chris Michaels of CSLKC said he noticed that my walk had changed and Rev. Jarie said she noticed a new swagger in my step. My voice got incredibly stronger and I started singing in ways I had not tried before. Bending more notes finding new ways to sing phrases of the songs I've written and performed.

In the song I wrote called Everyday there is a line that says, "I've been seeking the peace that washes over me, takes me completely." This is the feeling I have, bathed in peace and bathed in surrender.

We came home from the adventure July 21st 2010. I visited Chaz the next month in Tulsa. Sitting on my spot of the couch (Yes like the guy in Big Bang), I shared with him the new visions I was having. He reminded me that my job is very simple. My job, my business is to be worthy. I simply hold it out and let the passion the, juiciness and vibrant nature of my being pour out. He also reminded me that I am not alone and that others stand behind and with me to love and support me in doing a very simple job. 

In that moment, I actually felt files of thoughts deleting from my consciousness and tears of that peace began to flow.

 Bukeka

"It's All About YOU! Begins May 3rd. Every Tuesday in May 6pm to 7:30pm to register go to www.bukeka.com.  Also visit my friend Chaz Wesley at www.chazwesley.com

Preparing for Mother's day.

You now have three weeks to prepare for Mother's Day. You may be preparing for or possibly bracing yourself for the experience of remembering the life of your mother. Last week,  I sang for a memorial service for a mother of three and Grandmother of one. Her daughter is a very bright and progressive woman who I have had the privilege of connecting with named Jenny. 

I am very happy that I can still have lunch or dinner with my mother. Many of us call my mother "Just Joan" or "OhtheJoan" fondly after my web person "Ohthebill" Rosen. My mother is clearly worthy of the titles as well as the audaciousness that comes along with them. I say this in the most complimentary way. 

My mother Joan, is sweet, funny, tremendously caring and my possible ticket to having the next best reality TV show. During my surrender adventure with my cohort Chaz Wesley, I did release work around my mother and the feelings one has when loving someone who does have an opinion and will share it with you most of the time. .

What I came to realize is that whatever story my mother chooses to have or whatever memory she chooses to never let go of, she too is worthy of having it, if that's what she wants. In my childhood I wrote poems and stories about my wonderful mother. As an adult I found myself in a place of judgment about what she should be feeling or not, and asking myself "why is she making me feel this way?"

As much as I had come to understand about thoughts feelings, emotions and beliefs, I had a "mom-block". It's called "If it's not one thing it's your mother." But then it all came down to worthiness. Her worthiness, my worthiness, we all matter and have value regardless of how we display ourselves.

So if you are experiencing anything around the concepts of self-worth and mothers, take this moment to breath, allow, love yourself and know your worth. 

Bukeka

Upcoming Events

"It's All About YOU! in Kansas City. Beginning 5/3/11. To register see www.Bukeka.com.